Did you know that the average, healthy weight of a 30 year old woman is around 165 lbs? I will never forget about this conversation with my OB/GYN during my first postpartum appointment.
As someone who has never been able to drop below 155 lbs, and usually hangs out around 165 lbs, I was shocked. Everyone says “don’t look at the scale” “the scale doesn’t matter”, and I do mostly agree with that.
I could have sworn though that someone along the way told me that I should be around 135 lbs to be considered healthy. So, I had spent a long time beating myself up for being “so overweight”, even though it turns out they were crazy.
I had already done a lot of work around what I wanted to think on purpose when it came to my postpartum body. This conversation with my OB reminded me of two things I had forgotten.
- Question everything you thought you knew to be true, and redecide on purpose what you want to believe instead.
- Your physical health is better when your mental health is better.
I love questioning what I know to be true, especially as a mama. We are taught to think a certain way as a child by our parents, by our teachers, by society, tv shows, movies, etc. What nobody tells us to do though is take everything we’ve heard and question whether or not we want to continue believing that now that we are adults and can think for ourselves.
We decide what is true. We decide what we believe to be true.
I decided to believe that my postpartum body would be the time in my life where I would finally see and appreciate my body for what it does, not how it looks.
I decided to believe that strength was what mattered, not skin. (Mama, you know what I’m talking about – that skin didn’t use to be so loose, huh!)
You know what’s true? Everything is temporary, including the shape that your body is in right now.
You know what else is true? Your body will only be as strong and fit and healthy as you think it can be. If you think you’ll never get your body back, or you’re not capable of having “that” body, it’s only because you are believing Kathy who told you back in 2008 that you’re only healthy if you’re at 135 lbs on the scale.
I will be completely honest and say that there were many days I would think I don’t love the way my body looks right now…but I also don’t hate the way it looks. I decided to believe that as much as I don’t love it, I also don’t hate it, and that was enough for me on those tough days.
Some days you just have to be grateful that you simply have a body.
Right now, I want you to think about you in 3 years. How do you want to remember your body when you think back to pregnancy and postpartum?
Do you want to remember the harsh, negative thoughts you had about yourself and your body? Or do you want to remember the beautiful and accepting thoughts you had about yourself and your body?
How do you want to remember your body when you think back to pregnancy and postpartum? Do you want to remember the horrible thoughts you had about yourself and your body? Or do you want to remember the beautiful and accepting thoughts you had about yourself and your body?
As I am writing this, I am 2 years and 2 months postpartum, and I can’t help but love this body that gave birth to my little human. I immediately think about how I worked out to show my body some love, not to punish it.
I think about how I started off only being able to lift 5 lbs dumbbells for the first few months because I was so weak. I don’t remember beating myself up about that, I remember thinking how cool that I get to start my weight lifting journey all over again and watch my body get stronger just as I watch my baby’s body get stronger, we’ll get big and strong together.
The way you think, makes all the difference. That’s why I created a Meal Planner that includes space to write down what thought I’m going to focus on that week. It may not seem like that’s something important to have when it comes to meal planning, but if you plan your meals thinking you hate your body, you’re not going to love your meals. If you plan your meals thinking you love your body, you’re going to be much more inclined to love those meals.
The Modern Mama Takes Action:
- Imagine yourself 2 years from now. What do you want her to remember about this time in your life? Do you want her to remember all of the bad body thoughts you had, how mean you were to yourself, how you didn’t question whether or not you could change your situation? No.
- Write down all of the thoughts you want to think when it comes to your body. Remember, thinking “I have a body” is better than “I hate my body”. Be sure to stretch it though and work on believing your body is capable of being strong and healthy, even if it doesn’t feel like it now.
- Download The Modern Meal Planner to start planning your meals with the intention of respecting and loving your body for all it’s doing for you. (Yes, there’s a line for you to write this down, because this matters more than you may know.)
